Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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