singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize