It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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