Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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