shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
