Christians are straight up FREAKS
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
