Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize