why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I just googled if crying burns calories
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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