this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize