remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
