My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
