and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
