i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
