what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Is it because I queefed?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
