Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize
