We need to rekindle our bromance
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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