i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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