We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
COCAINE IS GR8
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
