i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
My life is pants optional.
Randomize