Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
