He asked me if I "almost moaned"
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Blood and glitter go together right?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
