Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
