His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I didn't notice because vodka
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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