Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
