You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize