Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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