How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
no you cant smoke seaweed
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
When are your genitals available?
Randomize
