I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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