no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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