I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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