He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
