Jerry, you need to find god
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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