She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You took a bar mat shot.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
