There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
