So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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