You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
