Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
We talked him into tasing himself.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
