I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
