she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just pee around me
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Everclear isn't food dammit
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
