yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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