I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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