Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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