I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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