I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
