It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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