What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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