Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
