so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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