After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
