Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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