Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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